


Did You Try Turning It On and Back Off Again?

by CaptainKenway



Series: Shevine Police AU Because Why Not [2]
Category: The Voice (US) RPF, The Voice RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Police, Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-16
Updated: 2016-05-16
Packaged: 2018-06-08 22:24:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6876313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainKenway/pseuds/CaptainKenway
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Adam and Blake are officially dating. Life at the LAPD continues. Namely, their friends remain obnoxious and criminals still need to be caught.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Did You Try Turning It On and Back Off Again?

**Author's Note:**

> Welp, here’s a sequel I didn’t anticipate. Oh well.
> 
> You don’t need to read the first story in the series to understand this one. Does Not Compute focuses more on Adam and Blake initially getting together while this one is about them as an established couple. So you know, read what you want.
> 
> Enjoy!

Adam opened his eyes to the sun brightly shining on his face, which would forever be disgusting, and a warm arm slung around his waist, which remained the only thing that made waking up early bearable. He snuggled closer to his boyfriend, smiling as Blake mumbled something and pressed his face against his neck.

Blake made work more exciting even before they officially started dating six months ago. It was only last month when Blake’s apartment lease ended that the duo decided to live together, completely bypassing the pretense of Blake staying at Adam’s place temporarily while he looked for a new apartment. After all they went through it didn’t feel like living together was rushing anything. Blake wasn’t the first boyfriend Adam lived with but he was by far the most serious.

Even though the only disadvantage was that now that they lived together, Adam had no incentive to get to work early.

Adam’s eyes flew open to the digital clock on his table. Work. Shit. He jerked out of bed, swatting Blake when his boyfriend grumbled.

“It’s 7:40,” Adam said, jumping out of bed. “If we don’t leave soon we’re going to be obnoxiously late.”

“We’re already late,” Blake said, stretching slowly under the warmth of the covers. “No need to rush now.”

Adam chucked a shoe at him. Damn it. That was his shoe. He’ll need that in a bit. “This attitude isn’t very Head Detective of you.”

Blake shrugged, but slid out of bed. “I’m just accepting the inevitable. Even if we leave now, the traffic alone will make us late.”

“Well accept the inevitable and get your ass moving,” Adam said.

“Why do you want to get to work on time?” Blake asked, interrogating instead of moving. Typical annoying detective.

Adam huffed. “I need a reason to have good work ethic?”

“When I always beat you to the office whenever we didn’t live together?” Blake asked. “Yeah.”

“Fuck off,” Adam said. “Maybe I’m turning a new leaf.”

Blake just crossed his arms, cocked an eyebrow, and waited. The expectant silent treatment never failed to incite at least a little of Adam’s ire. Adam was terrible at maintaining silences, which was probably why Blake employed the tactic so much.

“Jesse may have insinuated that our relationship affected our work performances,” Adam said.

Blake pursed his lips. “What percentage was insinuated?

“He flat out said that living together made us sloppy investigators,” Adam said.

“Oh I don’t think so,” Blake said, tossing Adam back his shoe. He yanked open the first drawer he came across and retrieved a shirt. “Grab something for breakfast. We’re leaving now.”

“Can we use the siren?”

“No, that’s illegal,” Blake said, yanking on his jeans.

“What if I—”

“Using sirens to bypass rush hour traffic will always be illegal, Adam.”

Adam sighed loudly as he left their bedroom, pausing briefly to make his hair looked semi-presentable. “I’ll spend our entire lunch complaining if I have to suffer through any smug remarks in the tech den.”

“I’ll keep that in mind, darlin’.”

 

* * *

 

Adam was wary when his friends remained silent as he entered the tech den 27 minutes late. He stared at the other tech analysts as they barely looked up from their various projects. Jesse specifically looked suspiciously occupied.

He decided to test the waters.

“Hey, guys,” Adam greeted.

“Hey.”

“Sup.”

“Morning.”

“Hey, Adam.”

None of them even looked up from their work stations. Usually at least James or Mickey had an asinine comment. Matt, the newest tech analyst (though, he’s rapidly approaching his one year anniversary at the LAPD), unleashed nearly nonstop dry remarks after he got over his shyness. Jesse continued typing and making the occasional note in his work station adjacent to Adam’s.

Adam didn’t trust any of them.

He sat in his chair, slinging his laptop case onto his desk when he caught sight of it. He slowly peeled the ripped magazine page from where it was taped on his computer monitor. A few snickers echoed in the basement. He fucking knew that his friends were up to something.

“What the fuck?”

“We saw it and thought of you,” Jesse said, twirling in his chair to grin at Adam.

Adam’s face grew incredulous. “Cosmo? Really?”

“Don’t judge,” James called from across the room. “I think that there are a lot of helpful tips in there specifically suited for your situation.”

Adam unfolded the magazine article. “How to be the Perfect Cop’s Wife.”

“In ten easy steps,” Jesse said helpfully.

“We figured cop and detective are pretty interchangeable,” Matt said.

“We just wanted to show that we approve of your choices,” James said. “Plus we figured that you could use relationship advice from literally any source.”

 “Aww you guys,” Adam said, ripping up the article and tossing the remains into a trashcan without a second glance. “You’re so supportive. I’ll treasure it always.”

“At least we know that Adam is always down for some morning nookie,” Mickey said. “That should help keep Blake around.”

Adam flipped them off as he booted up his computer.

 

**1\. Make sure your man is always fed! Crime is a hard job. It’s easy for him to get distracted!**

 

“Hey, dipshit,” Adam said, walking into the occupied conference room. Luke and Blake blinked at him. Notes and tangled lines littered the walls and whiteboard. It looked very legit. It also made Adam concerned for how long the detective partners have been in this room. “Have you eaten yet?”

“Um...” came Blake’s intelligent response.

Adam eyed Luke suspiciously. “You haven’t eaten either, have you?”

Luke fidgeted, glancing at Blake. “Um...”

“You’re both equally useless,” Adam said. “It’s 3. How have you not noticed you skipped lunch?”

“Not everyone has to eat every two hours,” Blake said.

“If I can remember to eat twelve times a day you both can remember to eat three,” Adam said primly.

“We’re working a case,” Luke said. “We’ll take a break when—”

“You’re taking a break now because you’re both equally stupid and stubborn and even detectives need nutrients,” Adam said. “Case and point: Every other detective and person in the LAPD has eaten.”

“Darlin’, we’re on a roll,” Blake said.

“I’m ordering you to eat food not to stop talking about the case,” Adam said. “Unless you’re both terrible detectives and don’t remember any aspects of the case unless you’re in your little CSI headquarters room.”

“Have you looked through Hendrix’s computer files yet?” Luke asked.

“Maybe,” Adam said, pointedly shuffling some papers to the bottom of his stack of files. “Ask me again after you eat something.”

“You’re so persistent,” Luke muttered, stalking out of the room.

“Wow, that was easier than I thought,” Adam said.

“I haven’t left to eat yet,” Blake said.

“Well, yeah but I was just going to bribe you with sex,” Adam said. “That bargaining chip doesn’t really work on Luke.”

“I'm glad,” Blake said dryly.

Adam rolled his eyes. “Don’t get your panties in a twist. You know you’re my favorite detective.”

“And you’re my favorite tech analyst,” Blake said, walking the few steps to entirely invade Adam’s personal space.

A bang on the conference door jerked the couple apart. “Shelton, stop macking with your man. We’re eating now so we can get back to doing our jobs.”

Adam’s smirk widened at Luke’s pointed glare. “Look at you caring about your health.”

Luke scowled. “I’ll be in the car. You better be right behind me.”

“Ooh your partner is cranky today,” Adam said. “I think he needs to get laid.”

Blake snorted. “Probably.” He pecked Adam briefly on the lips. “See you in a few, darlin’.”

“Make good choices,” Adam called, the closing door probably cutting off his response. Adam tossed his findings on the table—he even highlighted key information. He spoiled them—and sauntered out of the now empty room.

 

**2\. Leave him notes to show you care. Even the simplest note can make a big difference!**

 

“I swear,” Jesse said earnestly.

Adam lifted an eyebrow skeptically. “I believe you saw something. But that? No way.”

“I wouldn’t lie to you about something like this,” Jesse said as the duo shuffled forward with the Penn Station line. “It’s too important.”

“Yeah, but...” Adam trailed off. “Gary can’t be related to Behati. That makes zero sense.”

“He’s old enough to be her father,” Jesse mused.

“If they are related, and I’m not saying I agree that they are—”

“If they’re not related then they’re dating,” Jesse interrupted, “and have some weird threesome relationship with a cougar.”

Adam shuttered. “I refuse to believe that Garlic Breath Gary is her father. If they're related at all then it’s through marriage.”

“I know what I saw,” Jesse said.

“And I do too,” Adam said. “You didn’t see anything explicitly suggesting Gary was her father. Besides, if they are that closely related why haven’t they ever said anything at work? Even though Behati spends the majority of her time in the forensic lab, she and Gary cross paths a lot.”

Jesse frowned. “They’ve always been civil to each other.”

“Exactly, civil,” Adam said. “That doesn’t scream father and daughter.”

“Gary was super interested when she started dating Anne.”

Adam snorted. “Yeah so was the majority of the precinct.”

“But Gary was really suspicious of Anne,” Jesse said, “like a protective father.”

“Stop grasping at straws,” Adam said. “You pulled that out of your ass.”

“Did not.”

“Did so.”

“Did n—”

“I can take the next person here!” the cashier called. Her smile turned genuine when she caught sight of Adam and Jesse. She gave them an obvious onceover.

“Come on,” Adam said. “It’s my turn to get lunch.”

“They’re related,” Jesse muttered.

“I’m not doing this with you right now,” Adam said. He turned to the cashier and smiled. “Can I get a chicken BLT hold the mayo and a club with extra pickle?”

“How domestic of you,” Jesse said.

“Fuck off and order,” Adam said.

“I’ll just take the meatball sub,” Jesse said. Adam paid the winking cashier and he and Jesse stepped to the side to wait for their order to be called.

“If he’s her father—”

“They don’t even have the same last name,” Adam interrupted. “Gary is not Behati’s father.”

Jesse pursed his lips. “Stepdad? Maybe she set him up with her mom.”

“Behati wouldn’t do that.”

“I thought you liked Gary,” Jesse said.

“I do,” Adam said. “I also know Behati wouldn’t want to mix business with her personal life.”

Jesse snorted. “Right that’s why she’s dating a coworker.”

Adam felt the beginnings of a migraine. “She wouldn’t want her mom to date a detective.”

“But you’re such a big fan of them,” Jesse said. “I thought you would be the biggest advocate for detective boyfriends.”

Luckily, a bored Penn Station employee called Adam’s order number and saved him from responding. Jesse fell into step beside him as they left the restaurant and crossed the street to the police department.

“I could see Garlic Breath Gary as her uncle,” Jesse said.

“They don’t act like they’re related,” Adam said. “Stop.”

“Maybe they separate their personal and work lives,” Jesse said. “Not everyone broadcasts every aspect of their personal lives like you and Blake.”

“We don’t broadcast every aspect of our personal lives,” Adam snapped.

“Sure you don’t,” Jesse said.

Adam glared on principle as they entered the LAPD. The department was half empty, but it was difficult to say if that was due to lunch hour or crime solving. Gary ate his usual ziti and garlic-coated breadsticks at his desk.

“Gary, I got you a thing,” Adam said, tossing him a small brown bag as they passed.

Gary opened it and frowned. “Tic tacs?”

“I had some extra,” Adam said.

“But this receipt said you got them this morning,” Gary said.

“Just take the bag, Gary,” Adam said.

“Um, thanks!” Gary called as Adam and Jesse kept walking. Adam waved.

“Gary doesn’t have any family pictures on his desk,” Jesse said as soon as Gary’s desk was behind them.

“They’re not fucking related,” Adam said. “Behati was probably being nice and they ran into one of Gary’s friends.”

“Gary has friends?” Jesse asked.

Adam swatted his friend as they halted next to Blake’s empty. His boyfriend was definitely solving crime. Blake rarely did something so plebian such as eating unless prompted. “Don’t be a dick.”

Jesse rubbed his arm pathetically as Adam scribbled on a post-it note.

“What are you doing?”

“Being domestic.”

Adam placed the note on the BLT then contemplatively eyed the surrounding hungry cops and detectives.

“Hey, everybody!” Adam yelled. The bullpen mostly quieted to stare at the tech analyst. Jesse muttered exasperatedly. Adam ignored him. “This is Blake’s sandwich. Not yours. If anybody touches it—I’m looking at you Jefferson—” The tall cop ducked his head, ears red. “I will find out and I will disembowel you. Or, more realistically, I’ll blast all your private information that you keep hidden directly to your family. Ok?”

Adam took the bullpen continuing its business as agreement.

“Right, of course you don’t broadcast every aspect of your relationship,” Jesse said.

“Oh fuck off,” Adam said, turning and gently placing the sandwich on Blake’s empty desk, leaving the note face up. “Let’s go to the tech den.”

_Don’t forget to eat, asshole._

 

**3\. Take things in stride. A cop’s job is often unpredictable. You need to be willing to go with the flow!**

 

“What happened?” Adam asked as soon as he caught sight of Luke. Luke heaved himself out of the small hospital chair.

Luke motioned for Adam to follow him. The tech analyst quickly matched Luke’s pace. “He fell when we were chasing a perp.”

Chasing a perp. Blake was always so eager to play hero. “How far did he fall?”

“About five stairs,” Luke said. “He dislocated his shoulder.”

“Oh.” Adam felt his shoulders unclench. “And you couldn’t tell me that bit of info over the phone? You made is sound like he shattered a leg.”

“He’s fine,” Luke said. “But the hospital was going to call you soon anyway. You’ll need to sign for him and take him home.”

Adam frowned. “Not to be unsympathetic, but it’s just a dislocated shoulder. Blake isn’t impaired. Why won’t the hospital let him check himself out? Even though I’d have to come in anyway to make sure that the idiot didn’t take a cab back to work.”

“There was a mix up with his morphine dosage,” Luke said, halting outside a room. Adam frowned. Was that...singing? “He was meant to get way less morphine than he did.”

“Wait so he’s—”

“High as a kite,” Luke said, opening the door. Yep, it was definitely singing. “Now go and gather your husband.”

“Boyfriend.”

“Technicalities,” Luke said. “I’ll get the doctor so you can check him out.”

Adam entered the sterile hospital room warily. The singing—something about a truck—cut off abruptly.

“Adam!” Blake greeted, grinning dopily at him.

“Hey, babe,” Adam said. Even high, his boyfriend was obviously thrilled to see him. Adam was charmed despite himself. He sidled next to the bed to hold Blake’s grabbing hands. “I heard you took a tumble.”

“I was fighting a perp,” Blake said earnestly. “At least three of them. They got me down before Luke arrived.”

“Really?” Adam asked. The detective looked away.

“No,” Blake said forlornly, “but that’s what I told Luke to say. He said a five stair fall isn’t impressive.”

“It’s very impressive,” Adam said. “Luke is just jealous.”

Blake’s blue eyes grew impossibly wide. “Seriously?”

“Duh,” Adam said. “Would I lie to you?”

“No you’re usually just sarcastic,” Blake said. His brow furrowed. “You’re not sarcastic now, are you?”

“Nope,” Adam said. “Luke has always been jealous of you.”

Blake’s face brightened. “Because I’m with you?”

Effortlessly charming. Adam swore Blake could charm even the most hardened criminal if he put his mind to it. He smiled. “That’s part of it.”

“I knew it,” Blake said, closing his eyes. He made no move to release Adam’s hand. “Adam?”

“Right here,” Adam said.

“We should paint the living room blue,” Blake said.

Adam raised an eyebrow. Neither were big on interior decorating. The most Adam contributed to their home decor was watching HGTV. “Give a whole new meaning to boys in blue?”

“What?” Blake cracked open one of his eyes. “No, because you like blue.”

Adam leaned forward conspiratorially. Blake opened his other eye, obviously intrigued. “Want to know a secret? I only like blue so much because of your eyes.”

Blake beamed. One hand swung up and jerkily poked Adam in the nose. “And the other guys said that I was the only sap in this relationship.”

“To be fair, you’re obnoxiously sappy all the time,” Adam said.

“That’s because I love you,” Blake said matter-of-factly. “You deserve it.”

Adam smiled, running a hand through his hair. “I love you too.”

Blake was still beaming when his doctor, followed closely by Luke, entered the room.

“You must be Adam,” the doctor said.

“The one and only,” Adam said.

“Mr. Shelton should be alright after the drugs leave his system, but be on the lookout fever and swelling,” the doctor said. “Follow me so I can give you more detailed information, you can check him out, and we can get him home.”

“Ok,” Adam said, tugging his hand. Blake refused to let go. “Um...one second. Blake, you need to let go.”

“No,” Blake said, “you’re my favorite hand to hold.”

“I’m coming back,” Adam said. “Won’t five minutes of no handholding make our reunion that much better?”

“No.”

“I’ll just wait outside,” the doctor said.

Luke turned to follow him. “Yeah me too—”

“Luke, stay here,” Adam said. Luke sighed resignedly. “Blake, how about we sub out hands?”

“What?” Blake and Luke asked. The only difference was Blake was genuinely confused while Luke sounded vaguely appalled.

“Blake, I’m going to leave, but Luke will hold your hand while I’m gone.”

“Luke?” Blake scrunched his face. “But you’re here.”

“Yeah, but I need to sign stuff so you can come home,” Adam said. “Don’t you want to come home?”

“But you’re here,” Blake said. “So what’s at home?”

“Our bed,” Adam said gently. “Don’t you want to relax on our bed?”

Blake nodded.

“Ok then,” Adam said. “Luke, get over here.”

“But...”

“Man up and hold your partner’s hand,” Adam said.

Luke grumbled but took Blake’s other hand.

“I don’t like it,” Blake said. “It’s not you.”

“Jesus Christ,” Luke muttered.

Adam shot him a dark look. He kept his voice soft for Blake. “Close your eyes and don’t think about it too much.”

“That doesn’t sound rapey at all,” Luke said. Adam hit the other detective in the shoulder as Blake obediently closed his eyes.

“I’ll be back soon,” Adam said. Blake reluctantly released Adam’s hand.

“I’ll miss you,” Blake said.

“I’ll miss you too,” Adam said. “I’ll be back in ten minutes max.”

“You both are disgusting,” Luke said.

“Bite me,” Adam said.

“No, only I can bite you,” Blake said. Adam snorted while Luke turned a brilliant shade of red. Adam waved at Blake when he walked out the door and nearly collided into Blake’s doctor. Luckily, the doctor seemed very sympathetic to clingy high people—or either he wanted to ensure the hospital didn’t get sued for fucking up Blake’s medicine—because he very promptly gave Adam the appropriate sign out sheets and a pamphlet of symptoms to watch out for.

Adam returned to the room about eight minutes later to find a pouting Blake moved into a wheelchair—as per hospital procedure—and still holding Luke’s hand. He grinned as soon as Adam entered the room and immediately threw Luke’s hand to the side.

“I missed you,” Blake said, latching onto Adam’s hand.

Adam kissed Blake briefly on the forehead. The detective beamed. “I missed you too.”

“Right, now that I’m not needed, I’m going back to work and writing up the report,” Luke said.

“Are you sure you don’t want to hold hands some more?” Adam asked. “It might be good for you.”

Blake tugged Adam’s hand. “I don’t want to hold Luke’s hand anymore.”

“We can find Luke someone else to hold,” Adam said.

“Luke does need a person,” Blake said. “Maybe then he’ll be less grumpy.”

“I’m leaving now,” Luke said loudly. He then turned and promptly fled into the hallway.

“I like dating you,” Blake said.

“What? So Luke can’t tease you?” Adam asked, as he one handedly maneuvered the wheelchair through the door and entered the hallway. Blake still refused to let go of his hand, leaving Adam awkwardly hunched over the wheelchair. The tech analyst pursed his lips. Getting Blake into the car might be a struggle.

“No, Luke always teases me,” Blake said. “I just like dating you.”

“Oh,” Adam said, flushing inexplicably. He had no idea that Blake’s usual sappy comments were actually censored from impossibly sappier, earnest comments. “I like dating you too.”

“Good.”

They moved through the hospital in relative silence, Blake more than content to just occasionally press his head against Adam’s arm. Some of the nurses were on the verge of cooing when they wheeled past the front desk.

“Where are we going?” Blake asked as caught sight of the exit.

“Home.”

“And do what?”

Adam planned to try and get Blake to nap after he captured some appropriately endearing blackmail videos. “Um we can watch Star Wars or something.”

Blake finally looked away from the clasped hands, tilting his head back so he could blink up at Adam. “Star Wars?”

“Yeah you know Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia, Han Solo...”

Blake stared up at him blankly. “Luke’s last name is Skywalker? He looks like a Humphrey. A Luke Humphrey.”

“What? No his last name is Bryan,” Adam said.

“Oh.” Blake frowned.

“Darth Vader?” Adam tried. “You don’t remember?”

Blake continued to look confused.

Adam grinned. “Babe, you’re about to lose your absolute shit.”

 

**4\. Don’t complain! Your husband will pull long hours and sacrifice a lot of personal time for his job. You need to accept this and ensure you don’t add extra stress to his life by complaining about his absence!**

 

“It’s nearly eight o’clock,” Adam said flatly, leaning against Blake’s desk. The majority of the bullpen was empty save for the cops on night shift. “Nothing about this case is going to change.”

Blake ran a hand through his hair. “I just need to—”

“You’ve worked long nights this entire week,” Adam said. “I miss you at home.”

“I know, darlin’,” Blake said as he reached for a stapler. “But I—”

“You need to come home,” Adam said, snatching the office equipment from Blake’s loose grasp. The detective huffed. “Come on. We already missed the new Property Brothers and another opportunity for you to see why Jonathan is distinctly hotter.”

“They’re identical twins, Adam,” Blake said. “They look the same.”

“It’s how he carries himself, Blake-y dearest,” Adam said, “which you will eventually understand.”

“I’ve seen Property Brothers before and I still don’t see—”

“Which is why the only solution is more Property Brothers. Property Brothers, you, me, and our couch,” Adam said. “It’s science. Don’t argue with me.”

Blake sighed. “I still need to run through some business records and reread the interviews...”

“Stop being a workaholic,” Adam said. “I know what cases you’re working. I can confidently say that none of them require an all-nighter. You and Luke aren’t doing that stupid competition to see who can solve the most cases in a week. So stop. Come home.”

“I—”

“Yeah, all crime is shitty, needs to be stopped, and yadda yadda,” Adam said, “but you’re officially cut off.”

“I can—”

Adam held up a hand. “You’re leaving those cases on your desk and coming home with me. You can’t escape.”

Blake snagged Adam’s hand, tugging until Adam scowled at him. “Darlin’, I’ll come home, which you would’ve known if you ever let me finish talking.”

“Oh,” Adam said.

Blake snorted, kissing him briefly. “You get worked up so easily, even when you already won.”

“Yeah well,” Adam said sheepishly. “You were in your crime solving mode. I was preparing for my trump card.”

“Sex?”

Adam shook his head. “Bubble bath.”

“Oh,” Blake said. “I should’ve held out for longer.”

“Eh, I can be persuaded to start one on the ride home,” Adam said.

Blake beamed. “I knew there was a reason I loved you.”

A wretching sound on the other side of the station went ignored except for a brief middle finger from Adam. “Come on,” the tech analyst said. “Let’s swing by Gourmet Wok before they close.”

 

**5\. But don’t let him walk over you!**

 

“Adam.”

“No.”

“ _Adam_.”

“My answer hasn’t changed in the past five minutes, cowboy. No.”

Blake sighed, slouching in Jesse’s vacant chair. “Adam, you’re being irrational.”

“Your face is irrational,” Adam said. “Just go in a corner or something. I’m almost done.”

“You said that twenty minutes ago,” Blake said.

“Well, this time I am almost done,” Adam said, typing on his computer. “Just hold your horses.”

Blake studied him. The tech analyst twitched and dutifully didn’t make eye contact. “Did you just start a new request?”

Adam’s glare didn’t quite cover up his wince. “Um no?”

“Adam, I can see your computer screen,” Blake said. “I’m not an idiot.”

“Well, so what if I did,” Adam challenged. “It’s barely five. You’ve worked tons of unnecessarily long nights.”

“Those nights weren’t when we had something planned,” Blake snapped. “My parents flew in from Oklahoma. The least you could do is come to the dinner I made reservations to three weeks ago.”

“I told you you can go,” Adam said. “I’ll catch up when I’m finished.”

“You’ll never be finished if you keep starting new things,” Blake said.

“This is a related request, okay?” Adam said. “I have to finish it so the other one is complete.”

Blake clamped down on his irritation and really looked at his boyfriend. Adam’s leg jittered against the floor, his eyes still hadn’t moved to his general direction, and he gnawed on his bottom lip. Christ, Blake was oblivious. He rolled Jesse’s chair to Adam’s work station. The tech analyst tensed.

“Adam, it’s okay to be nervous,” Blake said. “My parents will like you no matter what.”

“I’m not nervous,” Adam said. Blake just stared at him. The tech analyst swallowed. “Fine, I’m a tad nervous.”

“I was nervous when I met your family for the first time,” Blake said.

“I know,” Adam said, “but my family is about the most obnoxiously open family in existence. While yours...”

“I’ve been out to my family since I was a teenager,” Blake reminded. “They’re not going to smite you.”

He twitched. “But I’m the first serious boyfriend they’ll meet. They might’ve thought it was a phase or—”

“You’re overthinking this,” Blake said. “They’ll only be somewhat weird and partially aggressive because I’ve never introduced them to a serious significant other. Not because you’re a guy.”

Adam sighed. His leg still jumped under the desk but at least he looked at Blake now. Blake smiled encouragingly. “That’s marginally better I suppose.”

“Come on,” Blake said, tugging Adam lightly. “Let’s get you dolled up so you can wow my country bumpkin parents.”

Adam was still obviously reluctant, but he pushed away from his computer. “Fine. I suppose I can’t hide forever.”

“Plus now my parents will have confirmation that you’re real,” Blake said.

Adam frowned, taking his jacket out of Blake’s hands. “But we have the requisite couple photos on Facebook.”

“They think it might’ve been photoshopped,” Blake said.

Adam snorted. “Right, like you have the computer skills for that.”

Blake just smiled. “Then let’s prove to them that I can get an attractive city boy to fall for me.”

“And you’re lucky to have me,” Adam said.

“Of course.”

“And you also moped for weeks when you thought I was unavailable.”

Blake frowned. “That never—”

“Blake, this is my story,” Adam said.

“Ok, darlin’.”

“I don’t want you to give your parents the wrong impression about us,” Adam said.

“Course not.”

Adam released a shaky breath as the elevator dinged open and they climbed inside. Blake wrapped an arm around his waist. He pressed a kiss against his temple.

“You’ll win them over quicker than you can blink,” Blake said. “Trust me. By the time we leave, you’ll be the clear favorite.”

Adam relaxed into Blake. “I’ll hold you to that.”

 

**6\. A cop’s job is 24/7. Prepare for long nights and don’t wait up!**

“I know it’s late,” Blake said as Adam reentered the bullpen, crisp night air following him inside. The clock above the doors read well past midnight. Luke left thirty minutes ago to get coffee. When Blake checked his partner, he was out cold in the break room. Blake turned off the lights and vowed to wake him up in the next hour or so. “I know I promised to be home hours ago, but I can’t just leave this case for the morning. The Chief has been breathing down my neck all week because the feds are itching to jump onto the Strangler Case. I’m finally making leeway and—What are you doing?”

Blake frowned as his boyfriend set down a box of pizza—fresh pizza going by the smell—and shrugged his backpack to the floor. Adam threw a pair of sweatpants at Blake and took out his laptop. He continued gawking.

“If you can’t beat them, join them,” Adam said as he booted up his laptop on Usher’s long abandoned desk. He smiled. “Now catch me up on where you’re at.”

 

**7\. Your husband’s life relies on his partner and coworkers. Make sure his coworkers like you!**

 

Adam held Gary’s latest case files in his hands. Honestly, he should be more annoyed that Garlic Breath Gary’s cases automatically came to him, but Gary wasn’t too strenuous to deal with. Adam had grown very adept at speaking Gary so explanations took only about twelve repeats as opposed to twenty. Adam’s goal was to get that number down to seven by New Years.

The elevator dinged open, revealing his boyfriend’s empty desk on the other end of the bullpen. Adam smirked. He supposed the ten minutes he usually killed talking to Blake made up for being Gary’s unofficial tech handler.

He stepped out of the elevator and stopped almost immediately. He was used to the usual bullpen bustle, but that chaos didn’t distract Adam from instantly zeroing in on Blake and the newly transferred officer he was supposed to help during his first week. The officer was from South Dakota, which was the sole reason Adam assumed babysitting duty was assigned to Blake. But middle of nowhere country boys was not a sustainable bond. Adam’s eyes narrowed as the short officer shook his head at Blake.

“...with Officer Donovan,” the newbie said. Adam scowled at the officer’s name. She never hid her disdain for his and Blake’s relationship, but if her disdain was for interoffice relationships in general or gay relationships specifically, Adam had no idea. “She can help me with the Walter’s case.”

“I’m assigned to help you during your transitional period, Doug,” Blake said. Adam raised an eyebrow. How long had Doug been resisting Blake’s country boy charm? It sounded like even his irrationally large supply of patience was running out.

“Exactly,” Doug, apparently, interrupted. “You’re here to help me if I need it and I don’t.”

“I don’t understand why you’re resisting so much,” Blake said exasperatedly. “I’m not taking over your case. I’m just trying—”

“Why do you think?” Doug spat. “I don’t need someone like you breathing down my neck and following my every move. Fag.”

Blake’s mouth instantly clamped shut. Adam’s grip tightened around the thick file, vindictively pleased that Doug’s snippy, loud statement attracted quite a few glares from the bullpen. Doug would be ripped to shreds in time. Even if Blake wasn’t insanely popular, officers were always protective from outsiders, which was precisely what Doug remained until he endeared himself to the masses. But officer retaliation took too long for Adam’s taste.

Blake shook his head, sadly. He wasn’t even offended, just disappointed like a parent. Blake was too compassionate and optimistic for his own good. He let insults slide off his back when Adam was more than willing to jump down the offender’s throat. Of course, Adam had always been the more antagonistic of the two.

“You know that has nothing to do with our job,” Blake said way too calmly in Adam’s opinion. “We’re meant to uphold the law. That’s it. It’s not personal. Just know that I’m always here to help if you ever get your head out of your ass.”

Doug sneered as Blake walked away, oblivious to the increasingly hostile glares he was attracting. Luke looked intimidatingly vindictive. “I’ll be fine by myself even if the computers here are complete shit.”

Blake ignored Doug’s call, apparently more concerned in keeping the officers from shanking the newbie than he was in defending himself.

Welp. Looked like Gary’s case could wait.

Adam lightened his scowl, circling the bullpen so he didn’t attract Blake’s attention until it was too late. The detective’s eyes widened the second Adam stopped beside Doug. The new officer blinked at the tech analyst’s sudden appearance. Adam pretended that a slight hush fell over the precinct, even though the few snickers he did hear gave him a certain level of satisfaction.

“Hey, I couldn’t help but overhear you had computer problems?” Adam asked brightly. God, he sounded chirpily annoying. Doug nodded dubiously. “Great! I’m a tech analyst, but I can act IT for you. After all, IT and tech analysts are practically interchangeable.”

Doug’s frown lightened, automatically relaxing, like everyone else, when he found out Adam was just a harmless tech guy. His grin sharpened.

“Really? That’s awesome, especially since shouting about shitty office equipment isn’t the most professional,” Doug said sheepishly.

As opposed to insulting a superior officer. Adam forced a chuckle, nudging Doug. “It’s fine. The computers here make cavemen seem like an advanced culture.”

And Adam’s companionable nudge and harmless IT-esque status apparently broadcasted him as a “good dude” to Doug’s inane instincts because the officer actually laughed over something that definitely wasn’t even close to funny. “You can say that again. So what’s wrong with the computer?”

“Scooch over,” Adam said, blatantly ignoring Blake’s abort hand gestures. Blake would tire of it eventually. As nice as his boyfriend was, even he wasn’t immune to homophobic assholes. Plus Luke and Usher’s general amusement of Adam and disapproval of Doug would at least hinder Blake long enough for Adam to whisk Doug away if his boyfriend decided to actually try and stop him. Speaking of, Adam should probably try and throw together a plan.

Doug shifted easily. “I just logged in with the credentials IT gave me and the computer has been stuck on this screen.”

Adam smoothed his face. Ah, the login screen. The dumb fuck didn’t press enter after ‘logging in.’ He hmmed loudly. “This is a pickle. Here, sit down. I don’t want you standing while I mess around with this. No telling how long it’ll take.”

“Don’t have to tell me twice,” Doug said, plopping next to his desk.

“So where are you from?” Adam asked. “I haven’t seen you around here before.”

“I’m from Pierre, South Dakota,” Doug said. “Today is my first day.”

Wow, that must be a record for how quickly someone got on the majority of a department’s shit list. Adam typed rapidly on Doug’s computer. Doug sat obliviously on the other side of his desk, not able to see what Adam pulled up on his monitor. “No kidding. I have a cousin from Pierre. She dated a Doug a while back... You’re not Doug Whiteman are you?”

“Nope, Doug Richards,” the newbie officer said.

“Good,” Adam said jovially, “if you were Whiteman, I’d have to throw you around a bit. Whiteman broke my cousin’s heart.”

“Glad I’m not Whiteman then!” Doug said jovially.

Adam’s smile felt strained. Wow, Doug was a boring conversationalist. At least Adam was doing something stimulating so his focus wasn’t solely on the new officer. “You do have a babyface if you don’t mind me saying. What year did you graduate?”

Doug’s smile turned into a leer. “Hey, I can’t be much older than you.”

Adam paused mid-keystroke. That felt vaguely come on-ish. Adam glanced at Doug. Doug smirked back obliviously. He probably meant it in a distinctly dude bro way. Doug looked like a person on the receiving end of many bro-jobs. “I’m saying you graduated from the academy... five years ago?”

“Close, four,” Doug said.

“Huh,” Adam said, clicking away on the computer. He paused mid-scroll. The internet made it all too easy to find shit. He snorted.

“What?” Doug asked.

“You used to do ballet?” Adam asked. “How precious. That’s a surprisingly unmasculine activity for such a raging homophobe.”

That made the good humor leave his face. “What are you doing?”

“Welcoming you to the LAPD, telling you to fuck off, defending my boyfriend’s honor,” Adam listed. “Take your pick.”

Doug’s face twisted into a sneer. He leaned forward in his seat. “So you’re one of them.”

“I am,” Adam said, wiggling his fingers in a very mysterious manner. Doug continued scowling. “I’m surprised you’re so against gay people since your sister is a lesbian. Did you disown her or something?”

Doug blinked. “Sarah isn’t a lesbian.”

“Um...Do you never go on her Facebook?” Adam asked. “Trust me. She’s definitely a lesbian.”

Doug’s eye twitched. “No she’s not.”

“Her relationship status is with some girl named Chelsea,” Adam said. “Her About section literally says that she’s interested in women.”

“Sarah said she put she’s dating Chelsea as a joke.”

“And you believed that?” Adam asked. “Preteens make better detectives than you.”

Doug sputtered.

“She’s very committed to it if it is a joke,” Adam said, turning the monitor so Doug could see. “Just look at all these couple’s pictures. Actually, I guess you would just call them gal pal pictures. Just a couple of gals being really good pals.”

Doug’s face turned red. “Shut up.”

“Yeah, the only one who can really make me shut up is my boyfriend and you aren’t allowed to do even a fifth of what he does,” Adam said.

Doug stammered, clearly unsure whether to be mortified or wrathful.  Rage rapidly appeared to be winning.

“It’s funny how she knew such a blatant lie would appease you,” Adam mused. “The fact she knew you would never check Facebook is hilarious. She doesn’t even try to hide her relationship on here.” Adam noted Doug and Sarah’s mom liked many of her daughter’s statuses and pictures. It was reassuring that homophobia wasn’t a family trait. “I updated your status and changed your password, by the way.”

“What? That’s illegal,” Doug sputtered. “You can’t hack onto my Facebook.”

“Or you could make your password more complicated that your birthday,” Adam said.

Doug lunged forward. “Keep out of my stuff, you fag!”

Adam flinched when the newbie suddenly jerked back. Blake’s hands were clasped firmly on Doug’s shoulders. Blake knelt until he was inches from Doug’s ear. Adam stared, momentarily entranced by the foreign hostile lines on Blake’s face.

“Never insult Adam like that,” Blake said. “Apologize.”

Doug swallowed, stubbornly remaining silent.

Adam watched as Blake’s hands tightened on Doug’s shoulders. The South Dakota officer’s eyes bulged. “What did I say?” Blake muttered darkly.

Doug gasped. “I’m sorry.”

“Not gonna lie,” Adam said after a moment. “I’m kinda turned on right now.”

Blake threw Adam an exasperated look as heels clicked audibly through the quiet bullpen, the very quiet bullpen. Adam glanced up to see Chief Aguilera stalking towards them, face unreadable. Blake quickly stepped away from Doug, stuffing his hands innocently into his pockets.

She stopped, raising a single eyebrow. “Explain.”

“Here?” Doug asked.

Her other eyebrow soon joined the first one. “You made this a public spectacle. That’s how we’re going to finish it. Should I start with Adam?”

Doug lurched to his feet, clearly taking the Chief’s bait. Poor newbie thought speaking first would actually make him appear more innocent. “I’m being harassed.”

“Really? You’re playing the harassment card?” Adam said. “Actually I suppose the harassment card is different than the hate crime card. Carry on.”

Christina quieted the tech analyst with a glance.

“Adam offered to fix my computer problem and then he hacked onto my Facebook,” Doug said.

“Doug insulted a superior officer,” Adam said.

“How?” Christina asked.

Adam glanced at Blake who seemed content in remaining silent. “I only came up near the end of it, but Doug rejected Blake’s help while calling him a fag.”

“What did he do to you?” Christina asked.

Adam blinked. “Uh, he called me a fag after he found out Blake is my boyfriend.”

“Did you hack his Facebook?”

“Yeah,” Adam said, “even though hack is a strong word. His password is legit his birthday.”

“How do you even know when my birthday is?” Doug challenged, clearly oblivious to the fact that the Chief was about to talk.

“It’s in the LAPD’s employee records,” Adam said. “Anyone can access them.”

Christina held up a hand, cutting off Doug’s response. “Adam, don’t hack into employee’s personal accounts. Blake, I want you in my office in twenty minutes so we can discuss appropriate way to deal with workplace harassment. Doug, follow me.”

Adam and Blake watched as a cowering Doug followed Christina’s brisk departure. He still managed to shoot a glare at the couple as the elevators closed.

“That could’ve gone worse,” Adam said, logging out of Doug’s computer. The bullpen returned to its usual dull roar as soon as the elevator doors closed.

“At least the worst you got into was his Facebook,” Blake said. “I don’t know if the Chief would’ve been as lenient otherwise.”

Adam scoffed. “Please, the other records I found were from public domains. Christina wouldn’t have cared.”

“Other records?”

“Of course other records,” Adam said, grabbing Gary’s files. “I’m insulted that you think all the time I spent in front of his computer was spent ‘hacking’ onto his Facebook.”

Blake lifted up his hands placatingly, sitting back at his desk. Adam followed, high-fiving Luke and fist bumping Usher as he passed. “What else did you find?”

“He desecrated his high school’s mascot. I wish the report was more specific because desecration can be taken in so many ways,” Adam said. “But his lawyer mommy got most of his records expunged. Which makes me think that he either literally fucked the mascot or Douglas murdered small animals and his mom wanted to cover up his serial killer tendencies.”

Blake snorted.

“He also transferred from South Dakota because he had issues with authority,” Adam said. “But I’m not sure if authority as a concept gave him the issues—if so, it’s better for him to fear Christina now rather than later—or the fact his previous authority figure is a pure sugar daddy. The Pierre Chief is enough of a silver fox that the twink would definitely have to deal with his suppressed gay urges, which would make any homophobe rebellious. But I suppose only time will tell which led to his transfer.”

“You realize you made us a permanent enemy if he stays here.”

“Don’t be so melodramatic,” Adam said. “He’s not going to do anything drastic, especially since Christina will most likely keep him away from you during any case that’s too dangerous.”

“Still,” Blake said. “I have to put my lives in other cop’s hands on a daily basis...”

“Like we would ever let that asshole watch any of our backs unsupervised,” Luke said. Usher nodded. Blake ignored the other detectives and continued staring imploringly at Adam.

Adam sighed. “Fine. I won’t mess with him, but I’m not apologizing for today.”

“That’s all I ask,” Blake said. “You didn’t leave anything on his computer, did you?”

“Nope.” Adam tried to keep his face blank. Blake stared suspiciously.

“Adam.”

“I might’ve left a latent gay porn virus,” Adam said. “It should pop up and lock up his computer in a few days.”

“Adam,” Blake said exasperatedly.

“It’s mostly lumberjack stuff.”

“How does that make it better?”

Adam shrugged. “I thought you'd appreciate the plaid."

"Plaid."

"You know, your standarad outfit?"

Blake sighed, pinching his nose. Adam would forever chalk up his response as an overreaction. “Ok, but after that, no more messing with him.”

“I won’t go out of my way to mess with him,” Adam promised.

“Adam,” Blake said again.

“If he approaches me or talks about you, you know I’m going to retaliate,” he said. Blake’s blue eyes turned pleading. “Um...verbally.”

“Just keep it verbal, darlin’,” Blake said. “I won’t always be there to make sure you’re not killed.”

Adam saluted with two fingers.

 

**8\. But, more importantly, make sure his friends like you!**

 

“I have cookies,” Adam said, setting some cookies on Usher and Luke’s desks without waiting for a response. He brought the rest of the tin with him to Blake’s desk. “Do you want them?”

“Chocolate chip?” Usher asked.

“Of course,” Adam said, jumping so he sat on Blake’s desk. He dug a cookie out of the tin and stuffed it into his boyfriend’s mouth. Blake rolled his eyes. “I would never deceive you with raisin cookies.”

Usher smiled, biting into the cookie. His eyes widened. “Holy shit these are good. Are they homemade?”

“Yep,” Adam said.

Luke hummed. “Not bad. You finally learning how to bake like a good wife?”

“I can make every computer file vanish forever,” Adam said before Blake could do more than glare at his partner. Luckily, the cookie kept Blake from saying anything.

“Yeah and I can shoot you,” Luke said. “What’s your point?”

“Wow, you do need to get laid,” Usher said, pulling out his phone. “Do you want a one night stand or something serious? I have some girls I can set you up with either way.”

“I’m fine,” Luke said, aggressively taking another bite of his cookie.

“Clearly,” Blake said.

“It’s not lack of sex that has me cranky,” Luke said. “It’s the fact you assholes don’t ever work.”

“It’s definitely the lack of sex,” Adam said.

Blake grimaced. “Tell me about it. Do you know how often I’ve dealt with him one-on-one? It’s brutal.”

“Hey,” Luke snapped. “I held your hand. Shut it.”

“What?” Usher asked. Luke predictably flushed. Adam snickered until Blake nudged him.

“Who do you know that bakes?” Blake asked.

“Lots of people,” Adam said. “Why? Do you want something?”

“No, I’m just wondering where these cookies came from,” Blake said.

“Ah,” Adam said. “Behati.”

“Why’d she make you guys cookies and not share with us?” Usher asked as he stuffed another cookie into his mouth.

“Only these dozen were cleared,” Adam said. “She’s testing the other cookies now.”

Usher froze. “What?”

“Over 100 came in as evidence,” Adam said. He sighed as Usher spat out the cookie and chugged water. “If they were poisonous—which they’re _not_ —it would already be in your system.”

Luke frantically put on germ-x. “You’re messed up, Levine.”

“The cookies _aren’t_ poisonous,” Adam protested. “I don’t know why you’re freaking out.”

“Darlin’,” Blake began gently. Adam threw him an exasperated look. “Why did you feed us potentially poisonous cookies?”

“They aren’t poisonous,” Adam said. “That’s why I gave them to you.”

“Why did you think they were poisonous?” Luke snapped.

“I didn’t think they were poisonous,” Adam said. “The victim was shot.”

“What?” Usher asked.

“Where did the cookies come from?” Blake asked.

Adam sighed. They were so dramatic. Usher still looked betrayed. He’ll need to explain to Shakira what happened so she doesn’t retaliate when her boyfriend inevitably whined about this later. “They came from that one fancy bakery murder.  All the baked goods are evidence. The lead detective thinks that the owner might’ve been poisoned before she was shot so guess what Behati gets to do all day?”

“Give you a dead person’s cookies,” Luke muttered darkly.

“It’s not like the victim bled on them,” Adam said. “Stop being such a pussy.”

“I just don’t want to eat poisonous cookies,” Luke said.

“They’re not poisonous,” Adam snapped.

Blake’s touch on his thigh shifted his attention away from his whiney partner. Adam’s scowl softened. “Luke is a drama queen.”

Blake snorted while Luke sputtered. “I know, but maybe warn us when our baked goods come from a crime scene.”

“So picky,” Adam said, “but fine.”

“Fucking no common sense,” Luke said.

“Luke, shut up,” Blake said. Luke muttered quietly to himself. “So you just here spreading Behati’s nonpoisonous cookies or did you need to talk to Gary?”

“I visit you up here too,” Adam said.

“I know, but you generally don’t visit unless you’re doing something up here,” Blake said. “I’m not the only annoyingly work focused one. So no Gary today?”

Adam shrugged. “I’ll probably have to explain something to him later.”

“So I have you exclusively to myself for a while?” Blake asked.

“If you start fucking, I’m going to report you,” Luke said.

“Don’t be a prude,” Adam said.

“Man, are you sure you don’t want me to set you up with someone?” Usher asked. “Seriously, there’s this one girl who does this thing with her tongue—”

“I don’t want your sloppy seconds,” Luke said.

“My seconds aren’t sloppy,” Usher said. “Also it’s been at least a year since I was with her. Calm down.”

“So help me and Jesse settle a bet,” Adam said as Usher and Luke bickered in the background. “Are Gary and Behati related?”

Blake blinked and then smirked. “You’re an investigator. Don’t you know?”

“Fuck off,” Adam said. “I can’t snoop through Behati’s shit. We’re friends. Also, I tried to check out Gary and it’s like he doesn’t even exist outside of the LAPD and his mortgage loan. No marriage records, no education history, nothing. I think he might be a spy.”

“I did get the spy vibe when I first came here,” Blake said.

Adam rolled his eyes. “Just answer my question.”

“I don’t think that Gary is a spy,” Blake said solemnly.

“Blake.”

“Adam.”

“I will withhold sex,” Adam said.

“No you won’t,” Blake said. “If you didn’t withhold sex after I skipped lunch with your brother—”

“I fucking knew you didn’t forget,” he said, jabbing Blake’s shoulder.

“Then you won’t now,” Blake finished. “Don’t look so irritated. Your brother is intimidating.”

“He’s at least eight inches shorter than you,” Adam said.

“He’s scary when you’re not around,” Blake said.

“Have you met your family?” Adam said. “The same family you left me alone with the first time I met them.”

Blake winced. “I can’t control when I get called onto a case. You know that.”

“I was alone with them for over an hour,” Adam said. “You could’ve sat through a thirty minute lunch with Michael.”

“I’m sorry, ok?” Blake said. “I’ll meet with him.”

“Damn straight you’ll meet with him,” Adam said.

Blake poked Adam’s side until the tech analyst squirmed and stared down at him. “Gary and Behati aren’t related but she did buy a dog from him and his partner.”

“Partner?” Adam said. “Gary is gay? You’re kidding.”

“He’s not gay,” Blake said, “but he and Susan don’t believe in marriage hence the lack of marriage records.”

“Huh,” Adam said. “Wait, how do you know about Susan and I don’t?”

“Gary and I are bros,” Blake said.

“Blake, I’m being serious.”

“I met her my first month here,” Blake said, shrugging. “I bumped into her and Gary at the grocery store. Gary doesn’t really discuss his personal life as I’m sure you noticed since you thought Behati was his daughter.”

“What? No,” Adam protested as Blake started sniggering. “Jesse thought they’re related. I said they weren’t.”

“But you still had to ask,” Blake said. “You thought there was a chance that Behati came from Gary.”

Adam scowled as Blake kept laughing. “Whatever. I’m going to set up your playdate with Michael. I don’t care if Canada invades. You’re not leaving your fucking lunch.”

Blake didn’t even try to look admonished, still chuckling softly. “Ok, darlin’.”

“And I’m taking the cookies with me,” Adam said, sliding off Blake’s desk.

“Good!” Luke called to his back. Adam took a second to dig out another cookie and chuck it at Blake’s partner. Luke squealed very satisfyingly.

 

**9\. Support him no matter what. You’re the person he relies on the most.**

 

Adam flipped through their mail, waving at the neighbor girl who ducked behind blinds as soon as he acknowledged her. He glanced down. His sweatpants were baggy and only slightly frayed. Nothing too ogle-worthy. Of course, his currently bare torso might have something to do with her behavior.

He frowned as a he came to a thick cream envelope in their otherwise unnoteworthy stack of mail. Addressed to Blake and it was from the Trevor Project. Mysteries, mysteries.

“Blake, you got a thing,” Adam called as kicked the front door shut behind him. Blake yelled something indistinguishable in the shower. Adam plopped on the couch, tossing the boring bills and junk mail onto the coffee table. He glanced at towards the still shut bathroom door and tore the cream envelope open, pulling out and skimming a very elegant invitation formally inviting Blake to speak at a conference. How unexpectedly official, especially for a country boy. Adam tilted the regal envelope and the best thing fell onto his lap.

Oh my God.

Adam was still snickering when Blake exited the bathroom a minute later.

He frowned, water still dripping from his hair. “You ok, darlin’?”

“Y-you,” is all Adam managed to get out.

Blake saw the imposingly thick invitation and torn envelope. “Are you snooping through my mail?”

“I had to. Look how official it is,” Adam said, before breaking down cackling. He held up the wallet size picture that fell out of the envelope. “Look at your pose. Your fucking outfit! I just can’t...”

 “It’s for a good cause,” Blake said.

“They hardcore photoshopped your face,” Adam said, holding the picture an inch from his face. “I don’t think you have any pores.”

“Adam, it’s just a picture.”

“Nope,” Adam said. “They said that they’re going to blow it up to poster size at the event. Poster size Blake! There’ll be a poster version of you playing cowboy.”

“I told Michael I should just be in my police uniform,” Blake muttered.

“No that would make you look even more like a stripper. Michael made a terrible choice, but he did better than he could have,” Adam said. “Can I give this to Christina? She said something about rebooting the LAPD’s diversity campaign. I think they’ll have room for one very gay cowboy.”

Blake sat on the couch, forcing Adam to at least partially straighten.  “No.”

“Aren’t you always telling me how we need to sometimes do things that make us uncomfortable for the good of many?” Adam asked, knocking his shoulder against Blake’s.

“You know I was referring specifically to you getting rid of the wasp’s nest before the LAPD BBQ,” Blake said.

“Unfortunately your message is just as relevant now,” Adam said. “You might have to sacrifice some dignity in order to be an inspiration for the shy confused middle schoolers of LA.”

Blake flicked Adam’s ear. “Don’t use legitimate reasons for me to do something stupid.”

“So you admit the pictures are stupid!”

“Of course they’re stupid,” Blake said. “I have eyes.”

“Why the fuck are these pictures even themed?” Adam asked. He tried to keep from giggling at the picture. He didn’t want Blake to scowl pout at him again. But Adam couldn’t help it when his boyfriend was posing all model-esque and sexy and wearing the God-damned most heinous cowboy outfit he’s ever seen. “The invitation says you’re speaking at some LGBTQ conference in a month.”

“It was Michael’s idea,” Blake said.

“If I knew you felt that guilty about skipping your first lunch with Michael I would’ve made you wear something much less stupid for a photo.” He waggled his eyebrows but Blake continued looking unamused.

“I meant the conference. He’s helping organize it because it’s mostly local gay professionals. Lots of people college-aged and younger are attending,” Blake said. “Michael wanted me to speak, especially since there’s the stigma that police are homophobic.”

“Wait so this conference is led by gay professionals discussing struggles in their particular field?” Adam asked.

“Yep.”

“Why are the pictures themed then? Seriously,” Adam said. “Doesn’t that detract from the conference’s importance?”

“Michael says it makes us more approachable,” Blake said, grabbing the envelope and digging out a couple more pieces of papers Adam ignored after stumbling across the world's greatest photo. He should send a copy to Blake's mom.

“It makes you look like you’re playing dress up,” Adam said. He glanced at the picture again and a traitorous snort escaped him. “Of course, who am I to disagree with Michael? He helps out with this type of shit all the time.”

Blake slowly turned and smiled guilelessly at the tech analyst. “You make good points. I should just trust Michael’s judgement.”

Suspicion made Adam’s good humor rapidly ebb away. “Don’t hold back, Shelton. What got you all giddy?”

“Your brother just has good ideas,” Blake said.

Adam narrowed his eyes. “What does the paper say?”

“Oh this?” Blake asked, setting the small ivory piece of paper on top of the invitation. “It just encourages speakers to bring their partners with them.”

“That’s...not bad,” Adam said, reading the new piece of paper. He froze when he read the last line. Blake immediately began laughing. Horror overtook him. “Couples pictures?”

“Also themed,” Blake practically sang.

“Why,” Adam whined.

“Because it makes us scary adults more approachable,” Blake said. “It’s to appeal to the children.”

Adam scowled. “I’m not going. The themes are fucking ridiculous.”

“It’s too late,” Blake said, shoving a new God-damned annoying piece of paper in his face. “You’re already down as my plus one. All thanks to Michael.”

“What the fuck? I don’t even get a choice?” Adam asked. “I don’t want to look like a stupid dollar store cowboy.”

“I’m sure you could ask to dress up as a stupid dollar store bandit instead,” Blake said. “Michael will probably think it’s cute.”

“Ugh he would.”

“We’re scheduled to come in next weekend to shoot our picture together,” Blake read. “I’m sure we’ll make a very dashing poster.”

“I hate you both,” Adam said. “Michael more, but you’re dangerously close to passing him.”

“Imagine how cute we’ll be,” Blake said, face still smug. “Two people in law enforcement dating and solving crime. We're practically a Thursday night TV show.”

“But the outfits,” Adam said. “It would be fine if there weren’t any fucking outfits.”

“Adam, sometimes we need to do things that make us uncomfortable for the greater good,” Blake said sternly.

He scowled. “Don’t be such a moral compass. Why did you ever agree to Michael?”

“I had to,” Blake said. “He had so many good points during our playdate. I couldn’t just say no, especially since I stood him up last time.”

“Blake, have standards for yourself,” Adam said. “As soon as you saw the blue cowboy hat, you should’ve been gone.”

“I thought you liked me in blue."

“Not when you look like a rejected prom picture,” Adam said, waving the wallet size forcibly.

“If it makes you feel better, we only have to wear the costume for the poster,” Blake said. “We’ll wear regular clothes at the actual panel.”

“Damn straight we’re wearing regular clothes at the panel,” Adam said. “Wait, I have to talk at the panel now?”

“You don’t have to,” Blake said. “You can just sit in the crowd and be supportive arm candy.”

Adam nodded. “That’s what I like to hear. Ok, I’ll do it.”

“I assumed you would,” Blake said.

“But first I’m calling Michael,” Adam said. “I’m telling him the themes are stupid. We’re in the fucking LAPD. We should be treated with respect.”

Blake snorted, snagging Adam’s discarded coffee mug. “Good luck, darlin’.”

 

**10\. And always show that you love him!**

 

Adam and Blake huddled outside the police department, turning whenever a coworker obliviously walked by their hiding spot.

Blake lowered the newspaper. “Are you sure this doesn’t draw more attention to us?”

“It won’t if you read it like a normal person,” Adam said, flipping his newspaper pointedly. He sipped his coffee, shifting closer to Blake when a gray haired woman sat on the other end of the bench. Blake rested his arm behind Adam.

“We’ll have to face them eventually,” Blake said.

“Yes, and we’ll face them after Behati gives the all clear,” Adam said.

Blake folded the newspaper. “It’s probably not that bad.”

Adam stared. “Our friends got a hold of us posing as a couple of cowboys. Of course it’s bad. We look like the cover of a cheesy porn video.”

“Yeah they have the picture,” Blake said. “So what’s the worst that could happen?”

“I can’t believe you just asked that question,” Adam said. He frantically knocked the wooden bench. “What’s wrong with you?”

“I’m serious though,” Blake said. “Logically, what’s the worse they can do?”

“Get our picture turned into a statue,” Adam said seriously. “Immortalize it as a part of LAPD history.”

“And everybody is too cheap to chip in for that,” Blake said.

“Not if they get a college kid to do it,” Adam said. “Those kids will do anything for twenty bucks.”

“You sound like a pimp.”

Adam shrugged. “It’s true.”

“Okay, say that they do get a statue made,” Blake said. “We’ll most likely never see it. You know the Chief won’t let a gaudy statue permanently stay on LAPD property.”

“She wouldn’t,” Adam said. “Thank God for her good taste.”

Adam and Blake jerked their newspapers up as Luke walked by. He was actually whistling. Adam didn’t know if it was because he finally got laid or the email blast from last night made him that happy.

“This is your fault,” Adam said as soon as Luke entered the LAPD. He swore he saw the detective burst out laughing. Not a good sign. “None of this would’ve happened if you were better at bargaining.”

“You called Michael specifically to talk him out of the themed poster idea,” Blake said. “You failed to convince him to drop it.”

“It was too late by then,” Adam said. “All the other speakers and their partners posed for theirs. You could’ve nipped the idea in the bud when he first mentioned it to you.”

“But I wanted to make Michael happy so you would be happy,” Blake said.

Adam made a disgusted noise. “Don’t turn the dumbass cowboy costumes into a romantic gesture.”

“Why not?” Blake said. “You lose all fight and get ridiculously forgiving when I make romantic gestures.”

“Exactly,” Adam said. “It’s an unfair tactic because I need someone to blame at the end of the day after all of our coworkers mock us.”

Blake made a considering noise, taking a sip of Adam’s coffee. “We could blame Michael.”

“I’ll blame Michael if you stop stealing my coffee,” Adam said, snatching back his travel mug. “It’s not my fault you drain yours as soon as you get it.”

“But you always tell me how important eating and drinking is,” Blake said. “That includes coffee.”

“Oh now you listen to my lectures,” Adam scowled.

Blake widened his eyes. “Please?”

Adam glared a few moments despite the fact they both knew he would give in.

“You’re ridiculous,” Adam said, handing over his coffee. “A child.”

Blake shrugged. “I’ll give you some shitty police station coffee to make up for it.”

“So considerate,” Adam said, eyes flicking down to his buzzing phone. He bit back a groan. “Blake? Someone bought the gigantic poster of us.”

Blake gasped, choking on some coffee. Served him right. Adam patted his back. “Those were for sale?”

“Apparently.” Adam sighed. “We have no choice then. We have to go into work and own the fuck out of it.”

“Own it?”

“Um yeah,” Adam said. “We’ll get obnoxiously high and mighty whenever someone tries to make fun of us. It was for a great cause and we talked to a lot of curious LA youth.”

“Curious in more ways than one,” Blake said, nudging the tech analyst.

Adam rolled his eyes. “So we’ll act cocky and own all of the things—”

“Even the trashy cow print?”

“Especially the trashy cow print,” Adam said. “Then come lunchtime, we’ll escape and murder Michael.”

“Sounds good to me,” Blake said. “Don’t forget to ruin the poster if you can make it look like an accident.”

“For sure,” Adam said. “Love you, boo.”

“Love you too, darlin’,” Blake said, leaning forward to kiss Adam.

Adam smiled. “It always so nice when we do things as a couple.”


End file.
